Slog, Og and a belated blog

Wow, that was a long time without blogging - sorry! I entirely missed my one year bloggiversary - my first post was all about the first day of term last year - its a bit rubbish to be so distracted you miss your own birthday isn't it??

The thing is, I appear to have suddenly developed - and I'm not quite sure how to say this - a 'real' life. This is probably a good thing - people have visited my house and everything - it is, however, a bit odd. I have this friend, who checks in on me just to say hi, most days, I have visitors, I have people I confide in, not just a blog I confide in. This hasn't been my life since before I had DS1 pretty much, and I sort of wonder what I've been doing these last 7 years.

If you'd have told me a year ago, when I started this blog, that this would be my life now. That I would be regularly staying out til 1am and beyond, with a bunch of people whose homes I had an open invitation to, who would come round to see me, who would welcome and include my kids in our little gang, and who knew all my songs to sing along to when we went to open mic nights or had parties... well I think I'd probably have told you that I wasn't 20 years old anymore and not to be so bloody ridiculous. To be honest, if you'd have told me that three months ago, I'd have thought you were a little unhinged.


The OMC... kind of... in my head

But despite its seeming implausibility, that is, nonetheless, my life at the moment. Crush 2.0 says that his Open Mic nights aren't about the music, they're about the people... we just happen to play some music along the way. More importantly, he doesn't just say it, he makes it happen... and because he is sooo good at what he does (all gorgeousness and general perfection aside) my life has changed immeasurably.

I think a few weeks ago, I probably interacted more with Crush 2.0 than anyone else in my life, and its probably still a pretty close call, but actually now I'd say I spend at least as much time with the rest of the 'open mic crew' - lets call them OMC, I'm going to be all about the acronyms this post.

Of saying goodbye to summer...

There's a real back-to-school feeling in this house. Not just for DS1, who is whinging about next week already, but for me too. It has been an amazing summer. It has been the summer of Crush 2.0 absolutely, but it's been so much more than that - some sparked by him, some just me...


It's been the summer when I had male friends again, when a world that had been completely full of mums and children for so long suddenly opened up.
It's been a time when I've had fun, real fun, for the first time in a very very long time.
It's been a time when I've remembered I'm an artist, and that that used to mean something to me, and maybe it's starting to again
It's been a time when I've realised that maybe the me that I was with DS1's dad was not as completely stupid and naive as I'd come to think she was. That maybe I didn't need to throw out the baby with the bath water.
It's been a time when I've been intellectually challenged again, by the books Crush 2.0 has introduced me to.
It's been a time when I've been creative and I've written song after song after song.
It's been a time when I've let go completely of the notion of tidying and cleaning and just enjoyed my time with my kids.
It's been a time when I've let go of thinking 'I must do xxx for the kids sake' and just done stuff for me.
It's been a time when I've developed new business contacts.
It's been a time when I've deepened friendships with mum friends that were previously just another face in the playground.
It's been a time when I've let go of the dream of having another child.

Of slobbery, discovery and contentment

Nearly two weeks since my last blog and I still haven't really recovered from the holiday - DS1 went four days without brushing his teeth before I noticed we hadn't unpacked his toothbrush - and there is still a bag yet to unpack at my feet. I haven't really bothered getting back into any kind of routine, and my kitchen is not dissimilar to my student kitchen from the early 90s (minus the fellow staircase dwellers who might've take pity on me and done the washing up).

While it was sheer tiredness that started this new slobbery, I'm genuinely quite enjoying it - apart from the tripping over stuff and not being able to find anything, which is starting to get annoying. Without the relentless grind of tidying up and doing stuff and eating at certain times I have relaxed. I have enjoyed my kids more, I have enjoyed my life more, I have exercised more and have eaten better. I think my letting go has generally been a good thing for us as a family - the house less so. Crush 2.0 says what needs doing will get done - that's as good a reason as any to just cross my fingers and hope the cleaning fairies arrive one night isn't it?